Their average of 5.17in put us well down the pecker order.
Even French fellas fared better — inching to 11th place with 6.2in.
Men in Ecuador claimed to have the biggest trousersnakes, at an average of 6.93in, ahead of Cameroon (6.56in) and Bolivia (6.5in).
The smallest willies can be found in Cambodia at 3.95in — limping in behind Taiwan’s 4.24in tiddlers and forlorn Filipinos’ 4.27in.
Online pharmacy From Mars analysed Google data about people from 86 countries on their members and found the global average is 5.55in.
Germany came just above it — 39th on 5.72in and Argentina 30th on 5.86in.
US men polled 59th on 5.35in with Ireland in 70th on 5.03in and Aussies 43rd on 5.69in.
Pharmacist Navin Khosla said: “Most men have wondered at some time or other if their penis is big enough. Size can have a massive impact on confidence and self- image.”
Researchers also found Sudan shafts were fourth on 6.48in and Haiti fifth on 6.30in.
Senegal came sixth on 6.26in with Gambia, Cuba and the Netherlands joint seventh on 6.25in.
Researchers also found there were almost half a million online searches for penis size by UK men in the last year.
French fellas fared better — inching to 11th place with 6.2in